What did the duck say to the cashier when he was buying Chapstick?

Put it on my bill.

I'm not too sure how this works. Some kind of infection. But Blue Girl requires me to acknowledge her comedic genius (which I am happy to do, especially if the joke is original; she doesn't say.)

Then I have to email this post to M.A. Peel (which I will do when it has been posted).

Then, I think, I can optionally add to the sum total of global hilarity by adding a joke of my own. Which I will also do. Except that it isn't my own.

A guy from the city is taking a Sunday drive in the country. As he passes an orchard, he sees a farmer standing under an apple tree near the road, holding up a small pig who is eating apples off the tree. Amazed, he pulls over, gets out, and asks the farmer what in the world he's doing.

The farmer says "Well, Petunia here can't reach the apples by herself, so I'm giving her a little help."

The city slicker can't believe what he's hearing. "Isn't that an amazing waste of time?"

The farmer responds, puzzled: "What's time to a pig?"

I got that from Language Log. And I used it first at Agro.biodiver.se.

Now what? Am I better yet?

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